Independently Happy

I’ve been at a loss as too what to write about lately.  I’ve been thinking a lot about life in general.  I know that I should be out there actively searching for a career but I’m not done enjoying life yet.  Not to say that I won’t enjoy my life with a new career but I like the availability and the freedom my current job gives me.  I am so beyond excited to go see some more of the world in less than a month.  I will be spending as much time as possible on the beaches of California and I can not contain begin to describe how happy this makes me.  I just finished a book called Adulting.  I recommend it to anyone who is out there trying to pursue the “right” way to be a grown-up.  I’ve picked up a lot of insights from this book and I fully intend on using these.  I want to grow a small herb garden dill, cilantro, mint to start with.  I am missing being a child at my grannys and having her send us to the yard to pull fresh sprigs of dill to cook with.  I try to a devotional a day at least, and todays devotional was about hate and how we really should not have hate in our hearts.  I struggled with this for a few years after a very terrible breakup but I know that despite all that has happened, and all that I’ve been through, I can not hate someone.  Its easy to focus all your energy on hatred for one person but, that also consumes you.  It’s just as easy to pick up a few hobbies, work on yourself and commit to being happy.  Easier said then done, but happiness is a journey.  A journey that sometimes is found in hitting the gym everyday or doing a devotional everyday or even cleaning that rats nest that you call a room that has consumed you while you were not happy.  Some days happiness may be found in making brownies and binge watching your favorite series on netflix.  Maybe perhaps happiness is something else to you, maybe a person however, when that person is gone it is up to you to be happy on your own.  Sometimes its hard to do anything but sulk.  No, get yourself up, take a shower, or a bath with some lovely lush products, get out of bed and go do something.  I’ve found in this last week or so that the best thing for me to do, is get out of bed, make it and do not return for the rest of the day.  I’ve found my hobbies again I love to read, collect and listen to records, and travel.  Being on my own gives me plenty of time to do these things and peace and quiet.  I’m attempting this blog here and though sometimes I may not want to write, I know that there are too many words just fumbling about in my head that need to be written down so they are not lost forever.  As long as I have an audience, or heck even if I don’t, I’ll continue to share my sporadic thoughts.

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