I’m losing sleep. Well, how could I ever close my eyes

I keep trying to grab the string of the balloon before its lost entirely to the clouds and the sky.

I guess that says a lot about you and I.

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so happy together?

When the chains are finally broken, and your arms are unbound, you breathe in a sigh of relief and say to yourself, thank God that isn’t me anymore.

the air smells so much fresher these days, the trails leading to all sorts of different ways.  The obsession is done, you’re no longer the target, best regards to you and your next broken hearted.

Shiny, happy people.

I like to make people smile, smiling is a really great gift that we are given.  Today, be one persons reason to smile, be one persons reason to be happy and don’t forget to be happy yourself.  It’s a beautiful world out there, if you wipe the sleep out of your eyes and actually look around.  Miracles and healing all around.  It’s time, time to take a deep breath and forgive.  Today I choose forgiveness, today I choose understanding.  You are not your situation, you are not the mistakes you make, and you are not broken.  You are on your way to being okay, and that in and of itself is quite okay.

Is it possible to bribe yourself?  Well, I’m going to!

Okay, so I did very well with this dietbet thing I took part in.  I lost a total of about 14 lbs but since then, I’ve been slacking a bit.  Okay, a lot. So, I think I’ve come up with a plan of action.  Starting September 1st, if I get fast food or a soda, I will be donating the amount spent, to a charity of my choice.  It will probably be the Houston food bank.  The only exception would be when I’m on vacation however, I will try my hardest to stick to this even with being away from home.  The way I see it, even if I mess up, which believe me I do, at least I’m donating to a good cause.  I don’t even like fast food so I don’t quite know why the craving is so out of control sometimes.  Same goes for soda!  It’s not even good! #crackiswack   Along with this, I will continue starting my fitness journey with bribes.  I say continue because upon writing this, I’m 4 days without working out which is just insane to me but my excuse and believe me I have plenty of those, is that I have been a bit under the weather.  Earache for amber is like a thorn in a lions paw!  Roar it hurts!  Starting September, the first week I hit the gym 5 days out of 7, I will reward myself with a new book, 2nd week a new vinyl, and so on.  If I can’t get to the gym in New York then I will at least go for a walk outside or sight seeing.  I need yet another kickstart back into my flow of things I hate missing days but once I miss, it’s easy to continue not going.  I think a lot about my lack of commitment to things and last night these thoughts kept me awake late into the night.  Why is it so hard for me to “seal the deal”?  I start lots of things that I never finish so what’s the deal?  At about 2am I remembered that my mom had given me a bag of stuff I left at her house and among those things, was the degree holder?  The thing they give you when you graduate a sleeve? Case? Displayer?  Something like that nevertheless, I put my degree in it and really stared at it and thought, I started school and then stopped…and then started…and then stopped…several times, but for once in my life, I saw it through to the end.  Well the end of one degree anyways.  No matter how long it took I saw it through and I will see this fitness journey through, even though it will never be through.  It is thoroughly something I enjoy and I won’t let me stop myself from becoming a better, stronger, fitter person.  I have so many things I want to do in life and literally taking the weight off my shoulders will help!  My first goal is to get back under 300 and my long term goal is to lose 100 lbs with no set time frame.  This journey is for me.